Harry Loves Benny. OUT in the Woods Part 8

Harry told me that this night wouldn’t be like any other night in my life. Having escaped the smothering heavy calloused hand of all hands, being able to escape no matter how terrified I was, able to get up when my legs were like a rubbery jelly and felt like they had fallen asleep, and my ability to run all the way home had to account for something along the road I was following. Now he was telling me there was more to come.

A fluttering sound near the open window brought my attention to that direction. The cabin’s walls had disappeared and just a window frame hung there. The backdrop looked like chicken wire shapes but without the boundary of a fence. Nothing behind it that would squawk, cluck or bite me. (1) The shapes began to become fluid moving all around shapes up front, shapes to the side, shapes to the back all around shapes of chicken wire. Then the shapes returned to their places, and then started up again, and then returned to their places. Over and over. Sometimes the shapes melted in and sometimes they melted out.

an example of chicken wire shapes.

Four birds no bigger than Alvin’s tip top of his pinkie came to rest on the window sill. “Hello,” said the little bird with black polka dot feathers. “I and my friends are here to help you and gazing at your brain I can see that you need all the help you can get. We help for free even.” Gee little bird that is not a very nice thing to say about someone who has just been scared nearly to death and is now moving out of his mind.” “Sorry buster, but I Red bird with black polka dot feathers calls it like I see it and then some and you baby are fully in need of the then some.” “yeah we are here to help you,” Yellow bird with orange feathers said, “We are going to teach you to fly.” HAAAAAAAA, HAAAAA shake my bowl full of jelly belly laugh. How are you, four little birds no bigger than Alvin’s pinkie finger going to help me fly?” Well, maybe, just maybe if you shut up and stop your silly little mind for a second we will show you. Do you think that we came all the way here just to sit on your window sill and look at you?” Not us we are far too important for that, we are the link that is missing that you need to go on and through injection you will go down that path of learning.

‘ OWWWEEEEE a little pink bird flew up my nose, half knocking me over in fright. How the fuck did that bird do that, fly up my nose? Rubbing my nose thankfully it is still there. Man does it hurt, it stings like I snuffed salted water up there and now I have a burning sensation. Where in god’s name is it going, to my brain. Maybe teach me to fly enter my brain reprogram me and away I will go. Hold on Buddy we’re not done with you yet said the mind of little pink bird now in my mind.

A do, do, do da ,do ,do ,do and a little black bird flew into my left ear. “Hey, you stupid human you should clean out your ears more often, you got potatoes growing in here. Let me rake out some of the gunk you been collecting while I wait for safe passage. Tiny little me, tiny little me, in I go to help this bitch to fly. Nasty cracker has dirty ears, give me a wash cloth some soap and water. I’ll clean up these 2 ears in no time flat. You might hear better too potato ears.

Yellow Bird looked at me and said, “I always get the most dangerous mission. Please remove your teeth, please remove your teeth, remove your teeth now. (2) I took out my teeth even though I didn’t wear dentures. Yellow Bird gave me a glass of soaking solution, Put them in this glass and when you are ready to have teeth again each one will go in really easy.” I stared at my teeth are those really my teeth my beautiful pearly white chompers, what in the other world is going on? ” Now silly man hold your tongue, please hold on to your tongue, hold your tongue with your fingers. I hate it when a tongue gets in the way. At least you don’t have any teeth so you won’t bite your tongue or chop off a tail feather of mine. Are you ready dirty eared, no teeth, holding your tongue coo coo human? Yellow Bird flew right in my mouth as I held on to my tongue. That bird went right through, down rather easy. I thought it would harder than a liver pill to swallow but that Yellow Bird wasn’t. Went right down didn’t even need a chaser. Would I burp up a feather that is left to be seen.

Mousey Brown Bird had been silent all along. Saying nothing, nothing at all. Just listening and watching. Cocking its head eye up looking right at me staring in my face. ” Now I know you won’t worry for your no virgin. I bet never in all of your life did you expect a bird to fly up your ass. I know you have had a lot of other things up there and I promise if I find any thing I will throw it out your bung hole’s back door. “Mousey Brown Bird do you want me to grease up my ass so the entering of my wild kingdom will be easy for you?” Nah, it don’t matter to me, just open wide your bung hole door. I hope you took a shit today, but I don’t plan on lingering too long in your storage area. Will take a quick look around the place and then go about my business and not linger around yours. Mousey Brown Bird flew towards me and before I could unzip and pull down my pants that little bird was up my ass in no time. OHHHHHHH, did that feel good. Better than all the gerbils in gerbil land, better than brown betty in the pet store, better than Tiny Tim’s tiny one. When Benny’s nephew wanted a gerbil as a pet Uncle Jack went to the pet store and the man told him “We are all out of gerbils.” “Yeah,” said the fat clerk, “Some guy is opening up a backyard circus and brought everyone one of them. He also brought all the cats and dogs in the place. Something about tension. He wanted 4 and 20 blackbirds and the same amount of black Halloween cats but we don’t stock such things, told him we would have to order them and he said, “Okay as long as I have them in a box by Sunday afternoon at 3:00PM.”

I looked around the room trying to see where Harry was. I am still in the house aren’t I? I wanted to ask him what the fuck was going on. There was no Harry and then there was no room. No room that I could see anyway. I was here, sitting in a chair, the window hung in space and I needed a drink real bad. Water, please give me a drink of water. A short-haired white dog that smelled like it had been rolling in dead fish came walking up to me and pissed on my pant leg. There’s your drink kiddy. “Hey, I can’t drink that it isn’t in a glass but all over my pant leg!”
” Well if you were out in the desert and the temperature was up over 100 I bet you would suck that piss right out of your pants.” Laughing the dirty dog walked away from me, then turned and growled, bearing all of its teeth.

A dog much like the dog that pissed on my pants and growled at me. I will never forget that face.

Shit man this is a bad trip. I should have stayed home minding my own beeswax instead of getting involved with all this out of my mind and into somewhere else stuff. The stove came into focus and on the top was a pot of something cooking. I got up from the chair and I swear I was two inches off the ground. Suddenly I was at the stove. How the hell did I do that. Did I float here? Did I fly. I was all of a sudden just there. I asked in my mind I wonder what is cooking on the stove as soon as I did the lid on the pot flew off and out jumped a carrot. The carrot flew up to the cross beams of the cabin. Hey, a carrot can fly and so can I. Up to the rafters I flew playing tag with the carrot. I banged my head on the cross beams. One head, two heads, three heads, four, spin me up and out the door. I chanted and flew away out the door the door that wasn’t there. Dodging bats and night birds wasn’t my style and it took some getting use to. I loved whooping at the stars and the moon. Looking down I saw the full room of the cabin. Harry was rubbing my body with some type of ointment. It smelled of mugwort and benzoin. I couldn’t put my nose on the other smells. What they were I couldn’t tell. (3) What are they and why do I want that smell on my body. Rub a dub dub, all over the place. With this little baby, fly away, fly away.

I wanted to go to Goon City to see it from up in the air. It wasn’t me that was flying or was it. I pealed out, got to get this starting flying under control I can’t be pealing out up in the sky. I don’t know when I looked back I was still laying on the bed in the full room. My mind is going where I hadn’t gone before. Yes I was flying with Mars by my side I was going. Drums pounding, war hoops sounding, To war! To war! I flew over Goon City over the run down section of town. Oh how I wished that some of my tormentors were out and about with their mouths wide open. I would take a good shit, bombs away right into their face. Some big smelly jelly donuts. Here goes a face full of pudding. There you go dinner is served. Nobody out and about. The streets were dark, Goon City was in bed, sound asleep. Wake up you fuckers! Get out of bed, come out and see, here is artist Benny up in the sky so high. Can you see me? Would scare the shit out of you if you did. Old bum Bobbin saw me, he was huddled in the back of the old Opera House trying to catch some zzzzzzzz, and looked up, “Well I’ll be a monkey’s uncle, there goes that crazy artist Benny flying through the sky. My wines playing tricks on me again.” Old Bum Bobbin pulled his ratty blanket over his head, better close myself off from this, make myself invisible, no telling what that Benny is up to now that he knows how to fly around in the early morning sky. Folks weren’t very nice to him last time he was here, and now he has teamed up with Mars. Heavens sake, Benny have mercy on us all in the run-down section of town. Maybe I had better get my ass out of here. Shit then I would be a moving target. Nah, wait, Benny and I was always friends. In fact the last time he was in town I shared some good cheese, bread  and grapes I got out of the dumpster behind Sid’s market. Still good. Why in the hell do these folks throw away good food. Guess its to feed folks like me. ( 4 ) You know somedays I get in that dumpster and find so much good food I set up a table out on the street and tell folks come on over take what you need. Good food, cheap, for free. Use you money for something else, like keeping the roof over your head or some milk for your children. Heat for your house in the winter you know all of the basic things. All the things that you need but don’t have cause the boss man, the big man, the rich man has his hands in your pockets.

Mars the god of war. (5)

I have to stop this. Scaring Old Bum Bobbin is not much fun. Bum Bobbin mumbled his prayers up to the sky, “Have mercy on us down here in the run down section of town.” Forgive us our trespasses oh flying by night Benny and Mars. Go find some other bad people to mess with.” Bum Bobbin is always very nice when I come into town. Could care less if I live out with Harry Johnson. In fact he was one of the few people who ask for Harry by his given name. I have got to stop this down-ness that is taking over this trip. I want to learn new things not be bounded by the past. I want to go home, home, home, I turned and headed for home at least it was in that direction or so I thought. Twinkle twinkle little star can you guide me home. I didn’t know how to get there. I was sleeping when the teacher was teaching astronomy. I am better in the day time, telling time by the sun. I will have to ask Harry about the night-time skies. BAMMMM! What the fuck was that I just pounded into.

Down from the sky click, click, click.

A very loud CLICK, CLICK, CLICK was sounding in my ear. I spun around 3 time and found that I was walking and walking. I had landed somewhere else. Somewhere that I didn’t know. Off in a meadow with thick woods all around. A tall green plant with yellow flowers called to me. “Oh Benny over here, I am good at directions.” Oh and who are you tall green plant with yellow flowers?” Just a tall green plant with yellow flowers and hairy underleafs that turn blue when the wind comes through. The tall green plant had eyeballs on each leaf but while staring at it I noticed that it had no mouth. Not a lip could be seen but still I could hear it talking to me. Did it talk through its eyes?  “Nonsense said 8 purple stones near the plant.

Amethyst (6)

 

That plant is a evil witch which has just flown into Benny’s trip from over the shadows and beyond some others and now are playing at being a plant so it can confuse Benny here. You really want to eat him as it is well know that men with big dicks taste good. Sort of like unborn lamb in the spring. Did you ever taste unborn lamb when in Rome. The poor little dead thing is all packaged up head and all right there in the super market for you to eat. Stew it up like rabbit. Tastes like it any way. The stone shone like no other purple I had ever seen, must be of royalty such a purple. Maybe a king, maybe a queen surely not something that is in between. Maybe the little worm sitting off to the side and all alone said, “Now if I was you man, I would pick a flower from the tall green plant and eat it up fast as fast can be. It would be to your benefit in learning that you are setting out to do now. Yes it would be to your benefit but if you swallow it on Tuesday watch out. Tuesday is a no day for swallowing a yellow flower. Yellow flowers may be swallowed on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. On Saturday you should refrain from flower eating and on Sunday you rest just like the lord of all did when he was creating everything that there was to be created. No, never on a Sunday should one eat and swallow a flower. Sit back, relax, take your shoes off, hang out and if you have to go to the bathroom you will have to raise your hand and asked the fair maiden who watches over folks that shouldn’t be doing anything, for permission to use the bathroom.” Otherwise hold it bub until the next day.

“Flower eating,” said the purple stone, “is nice to do and everyone should do it.” With that the purple stone shook the leaf of the tall green plant with yellow flowers and said, “Let’s get out of here before this man knows what is going on and wakes up from his dream. They left me alone in the scene of my dream, alone to fend for myself. “Hey, come back here, I forgot to ask where I am, and how do I get from here to there?” “Funny bunny,” said a purple stone,  “you’ll get no revelations out of us maybe you had better come back your second time around and ask then. Maybe your guide can help you but as you well know he is a lazy man who just likes to sleep in his chair no matter how many times folks say, GO TO BED! Right now he is in the corner snoring away while you are out here in out of your mind land trying to sort out all this confusion that is all around swallowing anything it can up and away. Just be careful as sorting through the confusion causes more confusion and confusion turns into confusions. That is what is happening to you right now. You must do some careful sorting out of the confusions just don’t throw away anything good. Stick it all in the box over there in the corner and come back later when you have a clear head. Then you can throw away any of the confusion that you don’t want or need. Here take this advise it will help you later in the night for something comes down the road.”

What ever it was I couldn’t see talking handed me a tall glass of Elderberry juice, instructed me to stand on one leg and drink it all down. While you are doing so say to yourself, now don’t let anyone else hear you, “I am standing on one leg drinking Elderberry Juice. Be right there. Nowhere else. Right there with nothing else. Not over there, or somewhere other than right here. Right there doing what you are doing, not stretching your mind into doing something else. How to be right there, nowhere else was the lesson, my mind wandered as I wanted to be over there as someone had baked a honey cake and I was drooling for a nice piece.

(7)

Benny and Hairy Benny naked in a pond.

He was standing there naked as a jay bird up to his knees in water. Dark hair all over his back and a nice bubble butt. I couldn’t take my eyes off his butt and wanted so much to lick it. To check out his tasty place. It had been a long time since I had a creamy ass hole in my mouth and I wanted one bad. He turned towards me and beckoned me to come over. I heard what you want to do to me and I would love you to try but first take off all your clothes and get in this nice cool water. You can call me Benny that’s my name. He was full of the passion flame, liked to talk a lot about sex and sex, why 7 days a week is fine with me. “Hey, that’s my name too. Benny messes around with Benny are we in a mirror land. I looked at his dick it did look a bit like mine only maybe just a tab bit longer. Straight and very suckable. Do you like kissing? Do you like humping? Do you like ass eating? Do you like the taste of cum? How about feet? Do you like to cuddle on the sofa all evening long? No I am more of the slam bam thank you and away I go type of man. Do a deposit and go about my business. On to what is next, around the bend, somewhere over the rainbow, the other side of the mountain. But I like men. Men, men, men. All types, all shapes, all sizes, men, men, men, I like men. Man are men good.

Hairy Benny told me all my boys are fucked doggy style turning me around, up on your knees bend over rover, can you bark, come on just a little bit. Put your rosy hole up in the air and spread your legs wide you’re in for a big surprise. His dick entered my ass and pump, pump, pump he did. It began to burn and sting like the ram rod was cutting my hole. Hairy Benny ramming his rod in young Benny’s ass began making funny noises. What the heck that doesn’t sound like a handsome man, like the man I saw in the water. Shit man that sounds like that dirty white dog’s growl. I tried to turn a look at what the fuck was happening but Hairy Benny held me down. I looked up and saw a mirror and Hairy Benny was me young Benny, fucking myself. But now I am a demon, changing quickly I am ugly, an old mess of a man a wrinkled, hairy big nose ugly old mess of a man. Hairy Benny let out a loud yell startling everything as far as my eyes could see and I felt hot cum in my ass. He turned me around and reached for my dick. With one good pull I came. His hands were attached to long rubber arms, and his dick was all purple and hung there like it needed another go round.  Damn after that round we really need a good rest. Let me up so I can run away.

(8)

His body was all hairy from neck to ankle, furry was more like it. Big balls swung low. Now that was nice, go home you are no longer a virgin in this world. He was gone. I had met a gay demon first one ever, at least he didn’t eat me. I stood up and noticed a burning sensation in my ass. It felt like I needed to let out what ever was in there. I knew the feeling from other times I was outside naked after a good fuck and had to squat and let the sperm out. So I did out on the ground. “Mama, Mamma, you let us out too early, Mamma, Mamma, Mamma we’ll die out here without the warmth of your oven.” Little furry shapes of ugly heads with scary funny faces cried up to me. (9)

They were in a foul-smelling puddle. Now this smell was one that I knew as a concocted mess. It was called “People Chaser” and used every so often when one wanted to see folks hold their nose and run, run, run. One part of, the tide is out, one part of 4 day old road kill, one part of bums shit from behind the bushes, dog shit on your shoe, bloated body washed up to shore, that was the smell. The smell was overwhelming and my butt hurt real bad, I fell asleep and woke up in all darkness.

Now this darkness was not like the dark outside of night for it had no shifting color of dark moving through dark, it was just dark. This was not a darkness lit by the night sky to guide you on the pathway. No it was a dark, dark, a stark dark, a dark, dark. I heard in my head, you have arrived in nothing. You are the only something here. I felt around, if I got in this nothing then there must be a way out. I walk and hit a wall, falling backwards, let’s try this again, getting up I stretched out my arms and felt the darkness. Remember when you use to walk around in your studio in the dark with your eyes closed. You made it more times than not, try that. Think, feel, smell, anything to get you around this nothing. Bam another wall. Turn once to your left and feel out a walk. Reaching another wall I thought holy shit I hope I am not in a box. I don’t like to be in boxes, so many times everything in life is in boxes, even Miss Reynolds sings about being put in boxes and all are just the same. Shit if I am in a box how do I get out. Break out. No those walls I felt were sturdy walls. I have no idea of what their make up is but know from the feeling that the walls are sturdy. I felt some more running my hands along the wall finally a corner, and another wall. Along this wall I went feeling and feeling then a little hole. A hole in the wall, I remembered way back to when I was small and my family was going to New Jersey to visit my aunt. She had a house in Sea Bright and we were going to spend a week or two with her. We pestered my mother that we should let our parakeet Bobby have the door to his cage open as he liked to fly around the house. So we did. Well much to our surprise when we got home Bobby had pecked and pecked at a small hole in the wall and made a large hole. Not of any understanding about a parakeet’s why, we said “What a bad boy Bobby.” To make matters worse we couldn’t find him but did notice a funny smell coming from behind the sofa. There he was a dead little Bobby. He was buried out in the back of the shed where our other pets had been buried. A nice little pet resting place.

So I say, now I don’t want to end up like Bobby but maybe if I dig at this hole in the wall that holds in nothing I will be able to get out to something. After all a hole in the wall no matter how small is something in nothing. Just then I felt a little breeze. A breeze in nothing there was something that had also made it into nothing. A light swishing sound came from the other side of me. That is where the breeze must be coming from. I felt along the wall, listening as I went getting closer to the origin of the sound. I jumped when veil like material brushed against my ankle. A veil like material in this land of nothing, I reached out closer to the veil, it gave away and I began to fall. I twirled around and around, falling, falling, falling and woke up when I jumped a good foot in my bed. Daring to open my eyes but ever so slowly, I look around the room. I was home. “Ah you are back, get up and have a nice cup of tea. I wrapped my arms around Harry, shaking and trembling. Come let’s have some tea to calm you down. You will need a good nights sleep after all of that traveling. I couldn’t sleep very well at all. I kept tossing and turning trying to make sense of what had happened. Harry came to me in a dream and told me to stop what I was doing and go to sleep. There is no need to think anything out tonight. Besides I am exhausted and don’t want your mind disturbing me. I am old and need sleep. I wanted to take a bath, to sit in the pond to pour water all over me, to drink all the water I could find, drink a glass of salt water to purge out my stomach, to drink down a cup of “Quickly Clean Out Your Poop Shute,” tea, to puke up anything that was in my stomach.

The smell of lavender came drifting up to the loft. Strong lavender, the strongest I have ever smelled. Falling asleep into dream land, I was a small child. I was out near our front porch, hammer in my hand working along with the adult men to fix up the porch. It was sagging in one corner and had to be straightened out so no one rolled off the porch and into the flower garden. “I will kill anyone who rolls off the porch and lands in my flowers,” my grandmother said. So instead of having fewer members of our family my father said to my mother, “I will fix the porch. Might as well to keep Ma happy, so she isn’t the one who rolls off the porch into the flowers. Then we would have to kill her and no one would be around then to make some good Swedish dishes.” Folks ranted about her head cheese for miles around. My mother said, “Well do it and get it done as I don’t want to have to come home and do all the cooking after working in the factory all day.” So my grandmother and mother dug up all the flowers from the front garden, my father and uncle move what few bushes were there and we set about fixing the porch. I don’t remember all of this as fact but when I was dreaming this is how it was told to me. (10)

The next morning damn did I sleep late I began to tell Harry all about my experiences. Sounds awful fishy to me. Someone out there was playing with you and seeing if you could play along or fold up. From what a little pink bird told me you held up quite well. You had pink bird on the brain, which is better they tell me than have a sky blue pink bird pecking around there. Odd Aggie Stone said them birds up your nose and into your brain get restless and can cause serious damage. Best to shoo it away with a few cats if they come around in your dreaming. Just think cat, big cats, the kind of house cat that like to kill and eat birds. That should do the trick. Those sky blue pink birds are scared of cats. They aint scared of much else but a cat comes a calling that bird gets out of there like there’s’ no next hour. Nope don’t let any of them around in your dreaming. So you did right by letting the little pink bird fly up your nose. She sat around in your brain giving you the directions that you needed when you seemed to be getting lost. One time, two times, three she never let you get that far. Didn’t want to lose you on your first trip out of your mind and into somewhere else. But I suppose if we did it wouldn’t matter none to us here. But you would be floating out there somewhere over something or other, and folks back in town would say I ate you for dinner. Nah, I would say, he wasn’t very tasty at all. How do I know well one time I bit him just to see, tasted more like sauerkraut without any sweetener. Every one knows that if you have some sauerkraut then you got to put in some sweetener. Nah, I didn’t eat him at all, he’s flying up there somewhere and Old Bum Bobbin will tell you all what he saw. Just ask him if you don’t believe what I am telling you.

We set out to work around mid-morning. Harry told me, “Regardless if you have been traveling all over the place last night we still have work to do. In three weeks fall will begin and then comes winter. If we want to eat and I know that I do we have lots of things to do yet.” I didn’t want to go out anywhere I wanted to talk about last night, what it all was about. I kept seeing those ugly smelly babies that came out of my ass. Crying to me as I was their Mamma. I suppose I was as they came out of me after doing the wild thing with that freaky wild thing. Harry just nodded his head when ever I began to talk about the experience. He was really of no help to me. “Benny, now I know you went on a very wild trip last night but as you can see we have work to do.” ” The pears are in their glory and must be picked so get that ladder out of the barn and bring it over here. We got a lot of picking to do today and then when we get back home we have to clean, cook and can these pears. We’re pretty lucky in these parts, over in Goon City they charge $1.50 a lb. for these beautiful babies. You might get some cheaper from Augie Gorrick but he has got to survive too. Someday we are going to walk over there when I hear his apples are ripe. Sort of a long walk but he’ll give us a ride back home. I like to put by some apples for the winter too. You know Benny we gotta eat, and in order to eat one has to work and then we really have no time for stories be they this world or any other. Right now I would prefer to have some things stored up for the winter rather than listening to you figure out what’s real, what’s not, what’s a maybe, or what’s a big playing you for a fool.

I’ll say one thing there is a lot of fool to come out of you just like there is a lot of fool in everyone. Being a fool is okay, it can get you places. Some folks back in the day pretended they were fools so they could survive. They were quite the entertainers and spoke openly. They told stories to the oppressed about their oppression. The fool and his various societies became so popular that during the fifteenth century the Church and state banned the Feast of Fools in an attempt to suppress its biting satires. Ha, try to ban a popular uprising it only goes underground. (11) Now your type of fool is a natural fool. It just is in you. You are not full of the alternative fool of which I speak. We could help you on that path if you want to go there. Would you like that Benny to become a clown, a jester, a fool who really isn’t but pretends he is and puts on a good show for the oppressed, maybe collects a few quarters and nickels for his trouble and then goes about your way to the next gig. Not a very good steady income but you will always find work as amongst the people there is always those who wish to throw a rotten tomato at the elite and the ruling class. I know I am one of those who would throw a tomato or two.

I hate the elite and ruling class. I despise everything about the bourgeoisie. I don’t care how nice they come across as being, or how many pies they bake for you, or how many times they pat you on your head and say, “Nice boy.” Sooner or later they will want you to go whoof, whoof. Good obedient boy doggie. How about a trick or two? Yes that is what they do. That is how they act around folks like us. The gots it and they show it. I pray for the day when we all can get together and pull those fuckers down. Pull them down onto the ground and stamp them out. Like the little blood sucking bugs they are. The worse are their underlings. Man can they be a nasty piece towards everyone else. They think they got something, they think they are up there with the big boys. Their just ass wipes really. Plain and simple, ass wipes. They should be the first to go. The “Go To People.” The ones that the elite, the ruling class, the politicians, depend on, the ones that make it easy for all this exploitation to go on. Take them away and Mr. and Mrs. Goody Goody will have to fend for themselves. Doesn’t sound very nice, as some would argue that these go to people are only doing what they do and we through education can save them and then they will join us. Bull shit I say. They’ve tasted that meat of the elite for too long. They can not be trusted. Off them first and then the fending for itself crowd will be easy to knock about.

The best cure for the headache of the ruling class or the French had the right idea.

My mind kept wandering I couldn’t listen to Harry as he spoke. His words blended into each other and became just noise. A sing-song noise, all around sounding noise. As soon as the noise became almost unbearable, like my head was going to burst it stopped. Harry had stopped talking and stood looking at me. Man I thought you may be stronger than I see you are Benny. Yes I guess we had better finish up here and go home and talk. But not until we have picked a good mess of pears. We can’t leave them on the tree any longer, got to pick them off the tree or they will just hang here fall off and rot on the ground. (12)

Sing, that is what you should do, sing a song. It doesn’t matter what song you sing, just sing to block out your mind from working overtime. Harry began to sing almost in a mocking tone, Sing a song, sing a song, sing a song all day long, your work will go by fast as a race car, and soon your mind will be one with the song. Sing a song, sing as song, sing a song all day long. I wanted to jump him, to knock him over, how could he be so mean to me. “Guess you didn’t learn too much last night, nope I can tell. A man is giving you some good advise trying to get you to laugh and sing and you want to beat him up. Let me tell you one thing about that, you won’t get very far in your moving towards me. Can stop you as quick as a jack rabbit runs away in fright of a man. So don’t even spend your time thinking such silly things. Just, Sing a song, sing a song, sing a song all day long. That should get you through the day. I know it sure helps me with my work. I sing all the time. Nope I know you don’t often hear me cause I don’t need to do anything out loud if I don’t want to. But here’s a song for you. Come on Deric, Abbey, and Alvin you can lead the song.

3 days later we finished putting all the pears in jars for the winter. We talked and talked and then Harry announced that he was going away for 4 days and that I should stay here and finish up some of the getting ready for the winter projects that we had listed near the door. Good place for a list so that way a person can take a look before leaving and what to do will be fresh in his mind. Harry didn’t tell me where he was going or why but headed out with a knap sack packed and his long walking stick. The dog howled, and howled. No stay home this time, Harry yelled. Benny will need some company and if you come with me who will send out a warning if something that goes bump in the night comes around here, knowing that I am gone. Good time to take a nice big bite out of Benny’s hide or maybe if it’s the big brown head chomper then that will be the end of Benny and his life story. Oh by the way Benny, that was you fucking yourself, you have a real nasty demon inside you that you got to do something about or I will have to put you out the door. He really liked your ass and wants to play some more with it. Nasty demons are nothing I want to mess with at my age. Sure I have fought off plenty in my life and will fight off some more before I die but those are mine and its my duty to fight them. I can only help you so far with such things. The rest you will have to do. There is a man I know down in the South that would love to help you out with this problem and maybe you should think about going there. You like to travel. Go there learn a trick or two on nasty demon outing and come on back here if you are so inclined. I’ll be here, always am, have always been, and always maybe will be. You know that always is a long long time. We’ll talk more about that when I get back.

NOTES:
(1) We love this bird. Now if I heard it at night I would pull the covers over my head and hope that it didn’t get in my tent.

(2) Teeth
Permanent teeth (or adult teeth) came after the series of primary teeth and are normally intended to remain in the mouth for the whole lifetime. There are 32 adult teeth, including eight incisors, four canines, eight premolars and twelve molars (with four wisdom teeth). The premolars replace primary molars, while the adult molars appear in a posterior position in the dental arch, not replacing any primary teeth.

(3) Witches flying ointment (safe version updated)
1/4 cup lard
1/2 tsp clove oil
1 tsp ash
1/4 tsp. dried cinquefoil
1/4 tsp. dried mugwort
1/4 tsp. dried thistle
1/4 dried vervain
1/2 tsp. benzoin tincture
Ritual : Using a mortar and pestle, crush the dried herbs until almost powdered. In a small cauldron or saucepan, heat the lard over a low flame until it is melted completely. Add the herbs, the clove oil and chimney soot to the lard base and mix well. Add the benzoin as a natural preservative, stir together clockwise and then simmer for ten to fifteen minutes. Strain it through cheesecloth into a small heat-resistant container and then allow it to cool. Store it in your refrigerator or in a cool dark place until it is ready to be used.
On a night of the Full Moon, anoint your temples and Third Eye with a small amount of the flying ointment.

( 4 )Here are a few facts on food from the dumpster. An excellent article, The Ultimate Guide to Dumpster Diving is found HERE.

If it looks good, smells good, and tastes good – it is good (the LSTG rule for short)

A few important points about dates, those dreaded indicators of food lifespan:
Best Before Dates: In North America, these have nothing to do with the safety of the food in question. It is an estimate placed by manufacturers as to how much time a food will remain “fresh” – that is, retain it’s best flavor and texture. Even though many stores and people will dump food that has passed its “best before” date, this date should not dissuade you from recovering food. The LSTG rule applies here.
Sell Before Dates: These are used by stores to keep track of inventory, and give an indication of when this food should be moved off the shelf, and to the dumpster. Oftentimes, these ‘sell by’ dates may be many days before the ‘best before’ dates.
Use By Dates: These dates indicate a manufacturers estimate as too how many days a product will be safe to eat. These dates are somewhat significant. However, it’s not like a food will suddenly be edible one day before the “use by” date, and then magically become inedible the next. These dates are usually conservative for the sake of safety and as protection from litigation.
It’s hard to imagine, but before the industrialization of food, people literally used the LSTG rule to determine if they could or could not use a particular food.

(5) Mars
Ares, Ares, bane of men, blood-stained stormer of cities…” –Phoebus Apollo, the Iliad. Mars / Ares was the god of war who charged into battle in a chariot harnessed to his two war horses, Deimos (Fear) and Phobos (Terror).

(6) Amethyst

Amethyst is also used to increase the strength spiritual awareness and intuitive of someone. Also used to ease headaches. Legend says, using the Amethyst or drinking from the cup made from it, will prevent the occurrence of virulence.
Throughout history amethyst has been used to guard against drunkenness and is thought to be helpful in overcoming addiction. It has been used for hearing disorders, insomnia, headaches and other pain. Some sources suggest it is used to stabilize mental disorders. Worn to make the wearer gentle and amiable. Amethyst powers include: dreams, healing, peace, love, spiritual upliftment, courage, psychism, protection against thieves, and happiness. Amethyst is the purple variety of quartz and the most valued member of the quartz family. It must be purple to be amethyst, but it can display a range of shades including deep purple, light lilac, lavender and mauve. Top quality amethyst is a deep medium purple with rose-colored flashes. Its purple color made it a stone of royalty for many thousands of years.
Amethyst is the purple variety of quartz and the most valued member of the quartz family. It must be purple to be amethyst, but it can display a range of shades including deep purple, light lilac, lavender and mauve. Top quality amethyst is a deep medium purple with rose-colored flashes. Its purple color made it a stone of royalty for many thousands of years.
This was the stone I saw talking near the plant. I know it anywhere because I have one in a small wooden box.

(7) Honey cake:
The use of honey in breads and cakes started thousands of years ago in the ancient civilizations of Egypt, Greece and Rome. The method was usually very simple: flour and honey were mixed together and then the mixture would “sit” for approximately a month until naturally produced yeasts caused it to rise. This formula was very basic and it took hundreds of years to develop recipes that contained additional ingredients such as spices, raisins and other dried fruit. The advantage of honey was not just its sweet taste, but its ability to keep pastry fresh for a long time (honey is an excellent liquid absorbent).
In the 12th century, nuns in Germany invented a real honey cake and in other parts of Europe the cake turned into biscuits, which were very much like the traditional “duvshanit” honey-flavored tea biscuits. At the same time in France, honey was used to make the famous traditional “spices bread” which included the use of other kinds of flour besides wheat. Every chef from every county and district swore that his recipe was the best in the whole of France, and contained the right combination of spices. From France the cake travelled to other countries such as Holland, Belgium and Italy, and in each place the cake developed further and acquired certain local characteristics. Other spices such as anise, cinnamon and ginger were also added. Ginger became so popular that it developed into one of the most familiar biscuits in England: the famous gingerbread.

(8) Name that Animal Penis. What was the demons penis really. Was it man, was it beast, was it demon. Name that penis.

(9) My Babies…Of course I didn’t bring any home to nurture, to love allowing them to grow up to take care of their mamma when I get old and grey. No not me. I left them right there on someone elses ground, no telling where I was and the last I heard some nuns had come along found the babies in the mud and took them to the nunnery to make good little servants of god out of these devilish things. So those babies who had come out of my ass were now living the life of piety. Mother nun said we get none all the time so we can certainly take care of these ugly little babies.

(10) Little Benny out pounding a nail.
Benny found this photo of himself as a small child out working on the front porch. He sure knew how to pound a nail even at that age. Never mind working that hammer. Yeah, if I had a hammer, well I do so I will pound that nail.

(11) FOOLS
In our own queer tradition Harry Hay one of the founders of the Mattachine Society an early gay rights group told us this: The name Mattachine derived from a medieval French society of unmarried townsmen who conducted dances and rituals in the countryside during the Feast of Fools at the vernal equinox. The original Mattachines always performed wearing masks; their dance rituals sometimes turned into peasant protests against the aristocracy. The Mattachine with their dance conveyed vital information to the oppressed in the 13th-15th century France. An alternative french name for the dance was “Boufons” which gave rise to our English word of Buffon’s, which also preserves the essential characteristics of the Mattachine——the flamboyant costumed jester who ridicules the false pretenses of society by his critical mocking, cloaked in comic antics and graceful dances.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Stultorum Chorea, The dance of fools; a group of fools join hands and dance in a ring around a fool playing a trumpet
Etching and engraving. 1550-1600. seed HERE for more information.

For readings on our Queer historical place in all of this see: The Trouble With Harry Hay, Stuart Timmons, Alyson Publications, 1990. Also Radically Gay, (Written works of Harry Hay), edited by Will Roscoe, Beacon Press, 1996, and Out Of The Past, Neil Miller, Vintage Books, 1995.

For an excellent essay on the fool, Bob has written, The History Of The Fool.
Bob writes in his essay: “As “vice,” a character in medieval morality and mumming plays, the fool was a fundamental part of the rustic tradition of the English countryside. In that tradition, he is a central character in both English culture and theater, one who never allows the audience to forget the interactive nature of either their reality or the theatre reality, and activity which always requires their full attention and involvement. “Vice” has the task of assuring the audience that no boundaries exist between the world of the play and the world of reality. He is the link between the exotic imagination of the play and the immediate world of the audience. His duties included improvising with the audience and sweeping aside the confines of the script in order to establish verisimilitude and an easy transformation between English oral and written traditions. When Shakespeare began his career, the “Vice” figure had been transformed by theatrical and societal norms into a recognized anarchist who made aberration obvious by carrying release to absurd extremes.”

(12)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bartlett Pear

Bartlett Pears ready to pick. Step right up Abbey help us out. All hands on deck, yes you can bring some home for later.
Most folks use sugar in their canned pears, Harry prefered to use honey or use no sweetener at all. Just plain old water. Pears are sweet enough to my taste without anything added. Some don’t agree and pour in sugar. One can always add a sweetener when they use the pears later. Instead of plunging the pears into a sugar syrup we use lemon juice to keep the fruit from turning brown.