Oh! art Oh! Part 4

I just don’t know what brought us here to Oh Art Oh Part 4. We weren’t even suppose to do a Part 2 or 3 never mind getting this far along in the game. We wonder more and more now a days if we really have anything to say. Even if we don’t we say it anyway and that is where we can find some fun. We hope you find some fun in our nothing to say too. Some don’t like what we say, some do and some don’t care. We are not troubled by the ones who don’t like what we say at all. ”My goodness,” we say, “we would be dead if we worried about people who didn’t like what we say, all of our life we have said what we want to say, got in trouble, shut up for a day, reflected on what was said, enjoyed every minute of upsetting the apple cart and ruffling the horses, and continued to say something even if we wondered if it were really nothing to say at all.”  Now those who like what we say are another story. We love them and many times when we are writing we think of them and if we can work them into the story we do. So here goes Oh, Art, Oh Part 4. Give us all a push I’m begging you Plumsky.

Who Hates Us The Most. Should we spend time on that when we really don’t give a shit.

Let’s play that little game, Who Hates Us the Most? Is it the collector?, nah he will always find something to put his money in as long as we allow such things to continue, Is it the museum, well maybe just a bit but then they have more stuff stored up all saying, “I am Art,” that they could continue for the next 100 yrs. Just hope they dust more often. Well then maybe it is the gallerists. Well now they of course would hate us as if we make nothing that appeals to the green crowd who likes to pass that germy, smelly stuff around then the too cool gallerists would be out of business.

”No,” as Emma just said, “I have gotten the most trouble from artists.”  They seem to hate art the most. They don’t like anything or anyone who questions art and art making. They all have so much something to say with paint and canvas, tool and junk or that is what they want us to think and everyone else who gets in the way. But all of this something to say doesn’t seem to get us up and out of the hot water that those who buy and sell all this something to say have gotten us into. You know those birds, we talked of them before. Those who prop up the Capitalist system. Those big money bitches who make the art world spin around. Off with their heads is the best art yet. So who is left OMG it must be the artist. Oh the artist who wants to keep this filthy system rolling around and over anyone whom it sees fit to do in, smash and flatten like a pancake with no egg.

Yes, I have to say, it is the artists who hasn’t any balls to cut the throats of those who make this system a go-go. Those who love their daily rich rub more than justice. Ugly worms creeping around, speaking the old art speak and doing the same old same old over and over again. Even your refreshing of the same old can’t fool us. You look groovy and 21st century but honey that crap is so old it smells like a dried up attic. Yes we know, its doing something to entertain the masses who like that which is oh so groovy. Something to keep them busy while the crooks seize all that they can, destroy the planet and ransack anything that they want. Pull wool over their eyes, don’t let them see what is really going on. Entertain them to the fullest with cheap thrills.

This fullness of something it’s called shit in my book, it is done to keep us away from the real truth. Put together with a made up truth by those who prop up the system. Something to look at while you all wait for the seeing of angels swooping down making war not love on the inhabitants of the planet earth. RUN you say–nowhere to run–as they will sniff you out like a rat does some good cheese. Then slap, slat, slap plop you go. Dead as a doornail and twice as dadaist as any dadaist. Yap, but give a clap, clap as art is nice to fill in gaps, to block your holes, to mend your rips, good to have something to do now before we all get to the there and scream a lot.

Guess What?

  • Arts groups are hurting fiscally this year. Well Miss Jean did you know that nonprofit arts groups grew from 73,000 to 104,000 since 1998 and at the rate of one every three hours from 2003-2008. One out of three failed to break even on their budgets even in the best economic years.
  • The arts follow the nation’s business cycle and depend on billions of dollars in consumer spending. researchers predict that the arts will hit bottom in 2011. (GOOD Clean up some of the messes.)
  • Attendance at mainstream arts organizations is in steady decline. Unless of course they have groovy Thursdays where all get together and chat up one another, and toast to each others grooviness.)
  • People are voting with their feet away from paying high ticket prices and more toward doing th arts. (yeah baby the last time I did Art he squirted all over my face.)
  • Nonprofits are struggling for charity dollars. Living off the goodness of others is not really a wise things to do.
  • Participation in the arts is increasing on the Internet, at ethnically and culturally specific organizations and at home as people create their own art.

She’s a dip give her the flip. by Miss Emma Furbird

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/08/arts/design/08frick.html

That will get you going. Read all about how the wall color transforms and makes the art stand out. Even the britches of Mr. Vincenzo Anatagi are awash with color. ” The coral amps up the green britches of El Greco’s portrait of Anastagi along with the brilliant whites of his stocking, and collar.” Thank goodness for the coral. Without it Anastagi would be so dull that he wouldn’t even be given a second glance. Oh what a coat of wall paint can do. I remember way back in the day there was a painter named fresh paint. That was fresh paints’ art to give a coat of fresh paint here and there. Maybe Mr. Fresh Paint was on to something. So where does this leave El Greco portrait. In the dust? Does Ms. Smith mean that it really never stood alone and out when it was on a white wall, a gold wall. If it takes a certain wall color to do this and then do that with a painting than what the fuck is the painting. Are we seeing the real painting or are we all a ga ga like Ms. Smith over the treatment of the wall color. Is someone playing a trick on us?

Here are a few of the funnies from that always funny Ms. Smith>

“The paintings seem to be freshly restored. They’re not. They simply benefit from the soft velvet coral, which sharpens details, brightens colors, clarifies compositions and deepens meanings. Suddenly this room stuns, becoming as never before one of the Frick’s destination galleries.

The East Gallery’s refurbishment also includes upgraded lighting and the addition of a large, comfortable cushioned bench. A good thing, since Frick-obsessed art lovers may need a seat when they realize that two of the museum’s best-known canvases have been relocated from their usual positions on the dark green velvet walls of the grand, emblematic West Gallery” Oh Heavens good thing as we might have more than a few swooners on our hand. All this way for nothing. Give me a seat so I don’t fall out on the floor in a fit of fainting. Art makes me tired I need a little snooze. The painting have been relocated, Oh Heavens to Betsy! I like them in this room not moved around. I always know where I am going to visit my favorite friends. Now give me a map Margaret.

El Greco’s “Vincenzo Anastagi,” center, rules over the refurbished East Gallery of the Frick Collection. The changes there, including a new coral wall color, are transformative.

Maybe next Ms. Smith will write about the floor finish, Oh, see it glow, I can see my face it’s so pretty, or the restrooms. I would like to write about who passed the mop and who is chairperson of the vessels. Now that would be writing about art in my mind. I always thought that Ms. Smith was a tad bit off.

Important art recycling program. You gotta have a gimmick. Oh Art Oh you’re just so darn pretty.

Is it Cheerios? Or Is It Art?

From the Hartford Courant 1/27/2010 (with some words in edgewise by Benny, Miss Jones and Moe.

Tired of recycling all those old cereal boxes? Not to worry. There’s a great alternative coming up this weekend. New York artist Michael Albert a self-styled ”Cerealist” who makes collages out of cereal boxes will be at the Burlington Public Library Saturday to run classes on making modern pop art. (Albert’s whirl wind tour) will begin at 1 pm when the public is invited to a reception for the artist and to view 21 of his prints exhibited through-out the library. At 1:30 (grab all that cheese, crackers, cookies and punch) Albert will lead an “Artist’s America Program,” for families during which he will discuss his work, using the exhibition to illustrate his talk. (now please don’t just drop off the kids and go.) We would appreciate it if parents came and participated in the program also. At 1:50 we hope your head isn’t spinning all around at least you will get to sit down, Albert will conduct a cereal box collage workshop during which participants will be able to create their own collages. Those planning on attending should bring their own cereal boxes. (if you don’t have enough in your house call a neighbor.) Now here is one reason Miss Jones loves Michael Albert sooooo. At the end of the program Albert will sign free gifts of art. FREE ART!! Great! I got a few holes in my walls and free art is just the things to hide the unsightly mess. Cerealism is the name that Albert has given to a body of work (over 600) made from cereal boxes which in turn have become one of his trademarks. Ha, Ha, does he eat all that cereal? “He is particularly intrigued by cereal and the lure of the cereal aisle and set out to create at least one version of every cereal box he could get his scissors on. Well now Miss Jones certainly a way not to clog up our landfill with cereal boxes, the Cerealist collages are very bright and pretty and gives both the artist and the attendees something to do with their time while they await the end of the world. Albert likens this art to Picasso’s Blue Period.  Below is a few examples from Picasso’s Blue Period and an example of Mr. Albert’s work. Something is screwy here and we don’t think its Picasso. Do you? Here are a few facts about the Blue Period.

The Blue Period (Spanish: Periodo Azul)
•1900 -1904
Monochromatic paintings in shades of blue and blue-green, only occasionally warmed by other colors. (Monochromatic Color: Different values (tints and shades) of one single color.)
•These somber works, inspired by Spain but painted in Paris, are now some of his most popular works, although he had difficulty selling them at the time.
•The blue period began when he learned about the death of one of his close friends.

The Old Guitar Player, 1903

 La Vie, 1903

Of Picasso’s Blue Period this is said, “His early years in Paris (1901-1904) coincide with his Blue Period. It is called  the Blue Period because most of his paintings were in shades of blue and blue-green and also because of  his general mood at this time. The subjects of these paintings were prostitutes and beggars. Blindness and destitution were an integral part of this theme of paintings.”

This is one of Mr. Albert’s wonderful collages.

 

Now this looks to happy to be blue. “Unless of course,” Miss Agnes added, “the artist was blue when he made this type of art.” Get it he was in a very blue mood when he created so many beautiful pictures. But you know we don’t care if its the blue , pink or green period we love Mr. Albert’s art and if we had more money we would buy a piece from him and hang it right up there on our walls. We gotta have something to look at when we sit around the house and why not get lost in a bit of beauty.

“Oh, please, please” Miss Mary May is saying. “Can I get in on the act. Now I am no Blue Period artist, nor am I a cubist but I like to play dress me up and take me out. Here is what I have done in homage to Mr. Albert’s visit to Burlington Connecticut. See it ,you will like it, and can buy it for $500.00.” I did another dress in green it is from Fruity Freakies cereal box and is lovely for summer time wearing. It even has a very large hat to keep the sun off my head. Queerartist told me I could only show one dress so I chose my Crazy Cow creation.

Robert Johns

For more of Michael Albert’s great art check him and his creations out HERE.

In your career. Some facts for the misguided.

“Art and Fine Arts Graduate School Programs-Masters & PhD Degrees.”

“Graduate programs in the Fine Arts emphasize creative and technical skills and some even prepare students for the business aspect. Concentration choices abound. Students that earn a maters (MA) or PhD degree in fine arts often go on to be painters, sculptors and photographers, while others go on to become professors. When our students become artists they then must spend years of unlearning all that has been drumed into their little heads on how to make some art. Otherwise they will make art that looks like everyone elses art or like what the professor told them is how to make some art.”

Cuban artist Carmen Herrera said it so well, “The hardest thing was to move away from all the academic training I had.”

**Graduate art programs are encompassing more than ever these days, which has led to an increase in popularity. No longer are art graduate schools simply havens for painters, sculptors and illustrators. You’ll find them there, too, but you will also find so much more when you enroll in a graduate art school.”

“Many offer specializations in fields such as art education, museum studies, and advertising and public relations. You are also likely to find art graduate programs that focus on graphic, textile and industrial design, as well as non-profit and arts administration. Graduate art schools offer nearly endless possibilities for students, especially those who would like to blend their artistic gifts with some knowledge of administrative areas.”

“College, from which some 1.5 million people will graduate this year, is, basically, a sleepover with grades. In college, it is not so cool to throw up or for your mother to come and take you home. But plenty of students do throw up, and undergo other forms of mental and bodily distress, and plenty take time off from school or drop out. Almost half the people who go to college never graduate. Except in the case of a few high fliers and a somewhat larger number of inveterate slackers, college is a stressful experience.” Really dear? But you better get that degree if you want to be anybody. We find even among the liberals a degree means everything. And the further up the ladder you climb you are celebrated and when that day comes you can add PhD to your name you have made it. Now you have respect and are looked at as knowing something. So bring your PhD and your books to the revolution the poor people of the world need you to tell them what is wrong and how to right side up it all.”

“Do you have a passion for being creative? Are you looking for a way to express yourself and make the most of your career at the same time? Do you enjoy drawing, computer animation, design, or other art-related subjects? If so, you might be well-suited for a degree in art and design. Art and design is a field that has a lot to offer students who pursue it. There are over 30 different majors and degree programs to choose from in the art industry, and that doesn’t include the different levels of education that can be attained.”

“Art is never chaste. Yes, art is dangerous. Where it is chaste, it is not art”.

 

 Our number 1 cry as artists this year and every year.

What is this?? A Dragon Tree Story.

Now here is the little story behind this photograph. The dragon tree use to stand in the wild and wooly area of woods near my home. It was the holy protector of all the fairies that lived in the brush and wood. Well one day crazy artist #6 came along and said, Oh, I would love a photograph of that Dragon Tree to send to queerartist and hope that it will appear on the site, A Few Queers On The Prowl. So crazy artist #6 did the deed of taking a photograph on Monday and by Thursday the tree was gone. A violent thunder-storm happened at night and lighting struck the Dragon Tree and knock it to smithereens. Now the Dragon Tree protects the fairies no more and I have heard that they have moved on to another place. We promise to check out the woods this spring to see if there is any sign of fairy life but according to old Hannah Wilson who knows such things she believes that they now live over hill and dale on the other side of the park. Queerartist prints this little story as a tribute to the Dragon Tree, the fairies and hope that this is a lesson to any crazy artists who come around these parts.

Dragon Tree

One never knows what they will see while out walking in this neighborhood.

One day out walking around the neighborhood with retired Professor Blading we came upon this Emergency Exit Do Not Block Door. “Do you see what I see,” said the professor? “Right there on the door, Well I will go Balder if it isn’t a spitting image of old Joe Crowley, coming though. Now I know he went on to meet his just reward a way up there in the sky and that he told us not once but twice that he would appear on any door if and when he felt like it. So aren’t we the lucky birds to come along just at the right time.” Now say your howdy do to Mr. Crowley. Hello Mr. Crowley.

 Professor Balding uses his umbrella to point out Old Joe Cowley Coming Through.

Artist has been here once, Stamped the picture and left.

The Art Of Forcing

Don’t be afraid to try forcing anything in your yard. ”It’s as much as an art as a science.” “I think it’s fun to just to cut a few things and put them in a vase and see what happens.” ..Denise Ellsworth

We found a nice little article on forcing branches and after reading the above quote said to ourselves “Why Not,” give it a go within Oh Art Oh, Part 4. We like art of this nature and we like nature. Things that are pretty and easy to bloom in the landscape are good candidates to bring in the house and force some flowers. We read all about this business in an article published in the Hartford Courant. The Article, “A Jump On Spring” was written by Mary Beth Breckenridge. Since we love Forsythia and have a little story to tell about our attempt to collected a nice batch last year we will give out the recipe for forcing some beautiful yellow blooms.

Forsythia for Forcing In January.

  1. If you have no bushes in your yard find some bushes where you can cut some branches.
  2. Cut branches to the length that you prefer.
  3. Bring indoors and recut stems under water. (This will prevent air bubbles from forming in the stems.)
  4. Submerge the branches in a bath tub of cool water. This process hydrates the stems and softens the flower bud.
  5. Place the branches in a lovely vase in which you have placed warm water with 1/2 teaspoon of bleach. (The bleach will prevent mold from growing.)
  6. Wait for the buds to open and then enjoy your lovely forced flower work of art.

A little story for the telling.

Last year around about this time Rickie and Goosey Bell went out on their annual Forsythia gathering detail. Up near the highway entrance there is an abundance of Forsythia bushes. The state plants the bushes not only for their beauty but also because the bushes hold the soil in place. So we were there picking away when a state cop stopped his car. Caught red-handed picking the states flowers by a state cop. I was quite surprised when the cop said, ” You know your not suppose to be on a highway.” “Well no officer I didn’t, I know nothing about highways, cars or how one is suppose to behave when they are near such things.” The cop gave me such an eye and said, ” What you think I am stupid or something that I would think you don’t know that pedestrians don’t belong on an entrances ramp, I should take you in but will let you go.” Don’t ever let me catch you on the highway again.!” Nor sir, let me just take my branches with me and we will be on our way.” Now what should we do this year? I will have to figure out a way to get to this good picking spot. Maybe I can approach it from the other way through the park and get to the back of the bushes. I will have to scout it out. I’ve had Forsythia in just about every place I have lived through out the years and do expect to have some again this year.

**We found some interesting information to add to this. Forsythia originated in China and is used by Chinese herbalists. Forsythia is listed among the 50 Fundamental Herbs in Chinese medicine. The unripe fruit and seeds are crushed for use as an herbal medicine. This is recomended for use for chills, fevers, headaches and to help expel toxins from the body, the premise being that cleansing occurs by inducing farting. It is use topically for burns, infected injuries, carbuncles, rashes and blemishes. Most Forsythia grown in American horticulture is a hybrid , F.x intermedia, a cross between F. Suspensa and F. Viridissima. F. Suspensa tablets the Forsythia grown in China and can be found in many health food stores.

Forsythia Suspensa

Oh how that art spirit moves in mysterious ways.

I very rarely take a look at the culturally acceptable counter-culture rag The Hartford Advocate but something drew me to it this week. Now it wasn’t the cover, never am taken in by their covers, and it wasn’t anything that I could put my little finger on but pick it up I did. Well soon I got my answer when I read the article below. The article appears in Up Front, Crime and Punishment, A roundup of the police reports from around the region. The article titled Smoke in the Boys’ Room is well worth the finger pain to type it word for word. Now we love art and art loves us so here goes.

Smoke in the Boys’ Room

Students had a little break from classes on the morning of Jan. 20 at Weaver High School in Hartford, thanks to a student who took out his frustration in a toilet stall. Myron Moye 18, allegedly went into the boys’ bathroom while someone was using the urinal, took some toilet paper and torched it in the stall. When things got too heated, Moye fled the lavatory and pulled the fire alarm, according to Hartford Police reports. Officers and firefighters arrived to find a toilet paper dispenser and stall divider charred beyond repair–$250 in damages.

Police brought Moye in for questioning and he provided a lame back-up story: He went into the bathroom because he got confused about his class schedule–he thought he had gym class, but it turned out he had art. (See what happens when one least expects it too. That old art spirit floating around may grab you.)

Moye was charged with reckless burning, second-degree reckless endangerment, second-degree criminal mischief and second-degree breach of peace. He is due back in court March 2. (Ah, come on officers that is a wee bit harsh don’t you think.)

>>So that is it, this business of Oh Art Oh, Part 4. We are inspired already to work on Oh Art Oh, Part 5 as we found some very interesting things that we can add to this crazy mix and continue our rant. How we love to rant and rave about things as all of you well know.  We do hope that you all enjoy our little rants so much that you leave a comment.

6 Responses to “Oh Art Oh, Part 4”

  1. Avery Auty Says:
    February 2, 2010 at 12:30 pm| Reply   editMy goodness you are still at it!! I like this one and hope that you never retire and just sit in your chair. You get my juices flowing when thinking about art but sometimes find it hard to catch up to you where you are at.I will tell my friends to come over and take a look at this. Thanks also for the links to the other Oh Art Oh works. Can’t wait for # 5.
  2. Alvin Says:
    February 2, 2010 at 11:13 pm| Reply   edit“College, from which some 1.5 million people will graduate this year, is, basically, a sleepover with grades.”THIS.
  3. Deric Says:
    February 8, 2010 at 3:28 pm| Reply   editYeah, more or less, Alvin. And the full quote’s got the right idea. In grad schools we’re trained to feel like we’re entitled to teach everyone around us–not about our research (or, better, just to share our opinions), but about “The Truth” (a very inegalitarian and unqueer process if there ever was one). Top it off, we’re taught for years on end to write and talk like assholes so that it requires a five minute reflection before sharing anything just to make sure you’re not mimicking jargonese and saying something that’s completely vacuous and stupid.Thanks, as always, for existing and putting pen to paper. Part 5, plz. kthnxbye.
  4. queerartist Says:
    February 9, 2010 at 11:35 am| Reply   editOne thing we will never do on this site is quietly accept that which others tell us is art. We don’t care if it is presented as the greatst thing since sliced bread. Which turned out by the way not to be so great. We like good home made bread that one has to slice with a knife.We love to question art and all that claims to be art. We love to question this system of art, artist, gallery, collector, museum who help to prop up this rotten system. We feel we can not as artists speak out against the nasty shit smelling capitalists with out taking into consideration the system of art that helps to prop this foul breeze up. We will never say how awful all the while making a buck from those old goblins. Man do we hate that kiss kiss in the air. You know what we mean. That phony bull shit, yeah worse than bull shit.We hate fame. We hate on the top. (except of course when someone is mounting us in good hot gueer sex) We believe that we all are teachers and that no one should nor should we accept the talking down to us by anyone. If it continues we will have to sneak out in the dark and smash everything that belongs to those who talk down and them some. HA! We can be bad boys when we want to be and nice little cupcakes when we need to be. We prowl around, we stalk, we say howdee-do so nice all the while we capture ideas for our next plunder.
  5. Michael Albert Says:
    February 13, 2010 at 5:58 pm| Reply   editYou’re funny! Believe it or not you can be Blue and create beauty (thank you!) But I meant to compare the Cerealism collages to Picasso’s Blue period more as: 1) a clearly defined period 2) as an important transforming period (when I became a father) 3) and as a period where I craeted many works in the same new style (over 600) that were mostly not sold at the time & now years later I am carefully allowing one or 2 here and there to escape my grasp (be sold) as they have become ‘famous’ (like Picasso’s Blue paintings) kind of as I have become the Cereal Box Collage artist & these were all my original cereal box collages…I think it’s funny how you picked Red Fruity Pebbles box rather than a Frosted Flakes Box which is Blue–come to think of it, so is Rice Krispies, Quisp, Total, Alphabits, etc !! Thanks for caring…and I appreciate your homage! Cheers, Michael
  6. emma Says:
    February 13, 2010 at 10:35 pm| Reply   editMichael we love your art. Your collages are very beautiful. Where did you get all the boxes from. Did you eat all the cereal? I loved the idea that you gave away signed free art when you were in Ct. This is what we here on this blog like.I asked queerartist why the red Fruity Pebbles box collage was chosen and it was because the group loved it. We do try to be a bit funny in our writing and have a good time with art. Miss Agnes hit it on the head that you have created so many beautiful pictures.Keep working Michael!!

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